I kept going back and forth with how to continue my story of how I came into my own as a submissive. I have even been speaking with the man who was my Master at that time as we both wrack our memories to try and remember exactly how things progressed. For us both, it is a huge jumble of memories where we only remember the times in which we had huge emotional breakthroughs in both of our lives.
It is quite interesting how I simply fell into the role. It is why I explain myself as a natural submissive to people who ask. It came and still comes quite naturally to me. My terms of speech, my need to make my Master proud and happy, and even the need to be punished at times for my transgressions.
You all will see a few things as my journey into this world progresses. The main thing is, I do believe in proper notation when speaking in type, however, you will not see these indicators unless I am speaking of current D/s relationships (not all D/s relationships are sexual). You may not understand what I am speaking of at this moment, but you will. I just ask you keep this in mind.
Another thing you may note, while my first relationship seems to follow in the footsteps of other D/s relationships in SL, my final beliefs in D/s have changed. They vary based on the depth of the D/s relationship. These are my views and I have found that they are not widely shared in SL. It is not believed that people disapprove of my views, simply see it differently. I have learned, above all, that we all view our relationships in different ways. There are some rights and some wrongs, but ultimately, how the relationship is handled is between the Dom(me) and sub themselves.
Let me leave you with this. My first discussion with the man who was to become my very first Master covered the basics of what he felt a submissive's role would be. He simply put all the possibilities out there, on the table, as in your face as they could be. It was up to us to define in which direction we would go. In this discussion I was introduced to slave auctions, public humiliation, speaking to strangers and friends in IM, handling others in public, and much more. No, this discussion was definitely not an easy one for me to digest. Even being so eager to please as I tend to be, some of these things would definitely test my personal strength and, in time, the love of my Master as well.
My stomach is growling and my brain is quite exhausted. I will leave you with this to pontificate on until the next time we speak.
Be well.
~ Kis
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